A Trinitarian Notion: Joy To The World

The Best Public Steward in America

Bloomsday (GNIP) v. Kasich (GNOP)

As the 2014 race for Governor of Ohio heats up, the metaphors are flying like spittle out of Kasich's mouth as he tries to talk himself out of one of several embarassing scandals that will prematurely ejaculate him from office faster than you can say "Marc Dann's Pajama Party has been cancelled."

U.T.W.H.T.M.T.,S.

Uncle James gets it right. He always does.

Leviathan: The Prequel

Oh, so that's what a caucus is...

To the Honorable C.:

They're Playing Our Song, Mr. County Executive-Elect...

The Duranalytic Mind

Courtroom Classroom Theater Church

As the first half of my Baby Sabbatical (TM) begins in earnest, today, I thought I'd discuss something scholarly. It has to do with client contact and courtroom demeanor in the context of mass indigent defense. And I mean specific to mass indigent defense. (I suppose some of my techniques could equally apply in other contexts, but I am not concerned with that here.)

Each day I enter a packed courtroom.  Each day I represent dozens of people at various stages of criminal proceedings against them. I stand in the center of the courtroom, gripping the podium as case after case is called.  It may be a pretrial on a case I know nothing about.  It may be a sentencing or a probation violation.  It may be a trifling traffic matter or a serious domestic assault.  It may be set for trial.  The witnesses may or may not have shown. The defendant may have more cases in the system that no one knows about yet. These are a paltry few of the possibilities.  At any rate, it is clearly in my interest and the interest of my clients that I stay focused on many issues at once involving several cases and many variables, all while standing at the podium in the eye of the storm. I believe someone once labeled it multi-tasking.  I prefer to think of it as situational awareness. It is an essential tool for any courtroom practitioner.

It's the same kind of tool used by a teacher in a classroom, an actor on stage, a priest in the pulpit.

Suffice it to say that, once court begins, I have entered a persona that allows me to succeed in the complex task at hand.  It may seem brusque. It may seem queer. It may seem rude. But the task at hand - protecting and ensuring the constitutional rights of the least among us in the Poverty Capital of America where I beg for justice and mercy for the poor as my father did before me before he died of a liquor-soaked broken heart - compels me to behave this way in the courtroom.

So, when someone steps in front of me to ask advice or gives me a "Pssst!" during court business, I either say without looking at them, "Not now," or give a look that you'd get if you interrupted my Hamlet, my physics lecture, my homily.  People find it utterly rude that I would refuse to stop the twenty things I'm doing at once to talk to them.  And, mostly, it's people usually looking for last minute advice because they know the judge will yell at them for not talking to a lawyer by now.

This interaction usually occurs in full view of others, often times recorded by microphone and/or camera.  A viewer may say, Gee, that lawyer's rude... or a viewer may say, Gee, that was dumb to interrupt that lawyer while he's clearly in the middle of several things at once.  I'll let the videos and transcripts speak for themselves.

Sunday News/Media Comment

Here is an interesting article on several levels.

Here's another evolving new government tidbit: racial politics and governmental transparency butt heads on December 6th. I'm working the nachos stand.

As a former child in need of airbrushing, I was amused to read this.

Kasich: Let Strickland Abolish the Death Penalty

Dear Goobernatorial Winner John Kasich:

You're first public act as Governor of Ohio - even before sworn in - is to vocally support your predecessor's decision to end the death penalty in our State.  You will find this act to have many advantages, political and personal.

Please know that your failure will ensure this: as your successor, my first public act as Governor of Ohio will be this epistolary missive declaring my intentions to run against you.

And, by then, there'd better be a bullet train that delivers me from my driveway to the Ohio Capitol in 90 minutes, goddammit. And good coffee, to and fro.  No cheap stuff.  I'd recommend Newman's Own.  You bring the Cream, I'll bring the Spoon.

"Hey, That's Governor Bloomsday Ova Dey!"

I hope Jerry Brown wins. I love Jerry Brown. I was the Cleveland guy for Jerry Brown's 92 Presidential bid. An honest talking political leader, more public servant than politician.

Which is why my first official task on the job as Governor of Ohio will be to hang out with Jerry Brown for a month. Sherrod, you can come, too. But I call shotgun.

This Episode of The Bloomsday Device is Brought To You With Limited Commercial Interruption by:

FIRST AMEND MINTS

FRESH BREATH. FREE EXPRESSION.


Unfinished Anniversary Pome
by Bloomsday

A Buddhist respect will never displease you:

It laughs at choice moments,

breaks shackles and frees you.

A Buddhist respect will never forsake you:

Its memories linger,

and dreamily wake you.

A Buddhist respect will never implore you:

It patiently waits

for it's chance to adore you.

A Buddhist respect will never provoke you:

It peacefully plods

in the darkness to poke you.

A Buddhist respect will never prevent you:

your choice to remain

is why Buddha has sent you.

For Those Playing Along @ Home...

Above the stupid, corrupt fray, I turn to the frank, rich wisdom of Frank Rich.

On the MasonStink front...

The Plain Dealer finally turns its head toward Dame Justice.

Then there's this curious missive to the silent citizenry, who shan't let this "polito-cracy" (really? couldn't come up with anything more apropos than that?) continue after January 1.   Curious, since the Plain Dealer gave thick cover to the corruption of the justice system for years for the sake of perp walks and prosecutor press releases, AND just exactly who were we to blow our whistles to, anyway?  Also, (a Bloomsday first!) I recommend the comments to this editorial as better editorial than the editorial.

Until the PD Editorial Board (and it's brand new Editor in Chief) make a mea culpa for past practices, us silent citizens will still consider it part of the problem.

W.W.Q.D.?

First off, we know, Quincy wouldn't have had to shit-can his "human resource guy" twice, especially after finding out that the masonic douchebag was secretly shaking down employees in Quincy's office for political contributions that never saw the light of day.

Prague Remembers Everything

The Plot Thickens

"Homina!Homina!Homina!"


Then, the plot thins.



Or is it ACTUALLY THICKER!!

Judge4Yourself

Bloomsday is ushered into the crowded conference room and led to the podium.  The city's highest echelon of lawyers have gathered to decide who shall be annointed, and who shall not.  "...or is it 'whom?'" he ponders.

He gulps and reaches into his pocket to find a meticulously folded drawing made a day earlier by his son: a pigeon driving a bus on a rollercoster.  After smoothing out its origami folds, he turns it over to find the words he scrawled while sitting in the hallway, moments ago.

He clears his throat and begins to read this.

"Homina!Homina!Homina!"

Enjoy this controlled release of information prepping us for the mothership's landing.

Vindication, Revisited (For Bill Haak)

Thousands of years ago, before I became a lawyer, I sat for the Ohio bar exam. While nearly every aspect of the experience has been forgotten, one peculiar detail has stayed put in my memory since then.

The test, itself, consisted of a dozen or so separately timed essay questions on one day, and another dozen or so separately timed questions on the second.  Each essay question involved a different legal topic, ranging from property law, wills and trusts, constitutional law, criminal procedure, civil procedure, et cetera.  Each topic was the subject of only one essay, so that you knew at the end of the first day, by process of elimination, which topics remained to be tested on the second day.

Unless. Unless you mistook a question on the first day for one legal topic when its intended subject was actually another.  This would mean two things: first, you may use that precious night between testing to cram study the wrong topic for the second day, and second, you could find a question on the second day that tested a topic you thought was already tested and realize, in the midst of the second day of essays, that you had totally nosedived on a first day essay.

And so, at the end of the first day, circa July 1994, a list of the topics remaining for the second day of testing was circulated by the bar exam prep course people.  One topic remaining on the list for the second day was civil procedure. This was a problem.  I had already answered a question I believed to be a civil procedure question on the first day.  If civil procedure had yet to be tested on the second day, then...

A unique sort of panic set in throughout the hotel that night.  I was not alone.  Others believed that they had answered a civil procedure question on that first day of testing, but it was clearly a small minority. The smartest echelon insisted we had mistook an obvious constitutional law question for a civil procedure question.  After all, it was the smartest echelon that originally reported their first day experience to the bar exam prep course people, who, in turn, posted the controversial list.

Early in the second day of testing, Bill and I found our vindication.  It was an obvious constitutional law question.  This meant that the contested first day question had, in fact, been a civil procedure question and not a constitutional law question.  The smartest echelon was wrong. That shrill, sanctimonious chorus of people we couldn't stand in law school was wrong.  And they all realized it -- digested their collective error -- at the exact same moment, soon after the proctor signaled, "Begin."

Fugitive Safe Surrender: "Was it a Success or Failure?"

I loathe false dichotomies.  Every element of the lives we lead are more complicated than the two sides of the coin.  I have reserved judgement on this "Safe Surrender" program until it's conclusion, as it should be, and now that the Cleveland Municipal Court component of the program has been cancelled for today ( "Yay! Ingenuityfest, Here Comes the Bloomsdays!") I will say that it was an utter nightmare of legal and logistic problems, and that I will say that I am proud to have helped navigate a few people through it.  Just like Gene Hackman in the Poseidon Adventure!  Actually, my stats were better than Hackman's.  The luxury cruise ship of a church was turned upside down by the process, packed with confused, anxious/nervous people.  It was a just idea.  I just wish it produced more just results.

The real heroes of the program were the bailiffs and clerks and who exemplified grace under pressure.  Getting people to follow paperwork through this bureaucratic funhouse was a torturous struggle.  Flowcharts be damned, the bailiffs and clerks understood the spirit of the event and I watched a hundred examples of devoted public service.  I love those people.  The first round's on me, ladies and gents.

J'accused, Maison Respondez Vous

[Letter to the Editor, PD, Twenty-first of Septemba]

David Barnhizer is just plain wrong (Opinion, Friday). There is an essential difference between criminal investigation, conducted by police agencies, and prosecution, conducted by prosecutors. The FBI is a federal criminal investigatory organization and handles cases like the county corruption probe because it has the resources to develop informants, conduct surveillance and wiretaps in long-term investigations. It has conducted similar probes in cities across the country. By Barnhizer's misguided logic, all of these local prosecutors across the country are either incompetent or corrupt.


The FBI investigates a case and typically refers it to the corresponding federal prosecutors. Whereas, local and state police agencies typically refer their investigations to city or county prosecutors. Local police do an excellent job, but do not have the same resources as the FBI.

I have always taken a tough stance on crime. During my tenure, my office has prosecuted more than 180,000 cases investigated by the more than 60 police agencies and approximately 1,000 law enforcement officers throughout Cuyahoga County. The nearly 300 public employees prosecuted by my office were investigated by local and state authorities. These efforts have resulted in a 90 percent conviction rate, which is far above the national average.

My office will continue to work with the federal authorities in their thorough investigation of the county corruption probe.

Bill Mason, Cleveland

J'accuse!

Anyone recall Emile Zola's involvement in "the Dreyfus Affair?" Zola wrote a letter to the president of France (Hey, they have a president!?) accusing bigwigs of an anti-Semetic plot to frame a Jewish officer in the French military. Zola's letter, writ large under the banner of J'accuse! opened public minds and reversed the course of the conspiracy.

Yesterday's letter to the Plain Dealer by CSU Law Professor David Barnhizer should have a similar impact on our current shit storm of corruption.  Here's the text, in full.


In the midst of the Cuyahoga County corruption scandals, there is an unasked question about the county's "800-pound gorilla," Bill Mason. The prosecutions and investigations in this and other cases have been done by federal authorities rather than by the office of Mason, Cuyahoga County's prosecutor. The question is why the chief law enforcement officer in the county, with a staff that is wired in to virtually all the local political machinery, as revealed in a recent Plain Dealer article, was unaware of or chose to ignore the cesspool of corruption, bribery, kickbacks and special deals for friends and contributors that has been Cuyahoga County.


Given Mason's amazing political reach and obvious sophistication, it is difficult to accept any claim that he was unaware of the corruption. The investigative power of a prosecutor is also substantial, as is the ability to use the grand jury as a device to uncover wrongdoing.

As we have seen, the culture was not simply a crooked auditor such as Frank Russo, but a comprehensive and ongoing scheme that had gone on for at least 10 years and spread throughout the entire system -- one in which Mason stands as the primary legal officer and prosecuting authority with enormous discretion and power. Yet if the federal authorities had not acted, there is absolutely no reason to believe that any of the disgusting criminal activity would have been revealed or prosecuted under Mason's watch.

The conclusions that could be drawn from this situation are several. The kindest is that Mason is incompetent due to his being entirely unaware of the pervasive rot that had spread throughout the public offices of Cuyahoga County. This, however, is difficult to accept, given Mason's political contacts, sophistication and undeniable leadership role in the county's political system. If incompetence is not the answer, then we, unfortunately, move to other possibilities, including that Mason was aware of the wrongdoing but chose to look the other way under some twisted concept of party loyalty or the idea that what was occurring was acceptable political patronage rather than criminal activity.

A third possibility is that Mason was a knowing part of this system and both distributed and received benefits from it in the way of other participants. Certainly there are some indications of questionable deals. These include the special employment arrangement given campaign contributor Michael Climaco, a significant reduction in the taxable base for Mason's residence and the lucrative contract given Peter Szigeti, who was not only a Mason employee but was awarded consultant payments of more than $1.1 million, contributed to Mason's campaign war chest and designed his political website.

There are legitimate questions to be asked and the only way to ask them with any force is to employ a special prosecutor to investigate and determine whether Mason ignored evidence of widespread criminal wrongdoing under his watch or even participated in the culture of corruption. It seems likely that the federal authorities might be asking these questions, but unless Mason is secretly cooperating with the feds and his beneficial contributions to that investigation will be explained at the end of the process, he appears to be cloaked with a Teflon shield that is insulating him from serious consequences.

Barnhizer is an emeritus professor of law at the Cleveland-Marshall College of Law, Cleveland State University.

The Maelstrom

As a lawyer amid the daily chaos of the court system, I find curious refuge in the Edgar Allen Poe story, A Descent into the Maelstrom.  The tale, told by an elderly survivor to a terrified, younger listener as they cling to the windswept craggy rocks overlooking the site of the recurring phenomenon, always held powerful sway over me.

"Ooh, giant whirlpool!  How scary!" you may mock.  But Poe's description of the vicious immorality of nature, the helplessness that is the counterpoint to the senseless (but utterly predictable) destruction of the giant, sucking swirl of sea is chilling.

If studied carefully, the story is far more than spooky.  It is an illumination.  That's because the survivor who tells the tale uses a novel pair of skills to save himself: situational awareness and pattern recognition.  The story is really a survival guide; a petition, not of faith, but of wisdom.

I have applied those skills in navigating the courtroom.  I have applied those skills in navigating a corrupt government in my town.  As we will soon learn here in Cleveland and its Cuyahoga environs, it is not the powerful who will survive the maelstrom. It is the wise.

Despicable Politicking or How I Helped the Levy Pass

As a shipping manifest details all sorts of cargo to destinations unknown, a federal indictiment (or information, if you will) can provide illumination on the level our status quo county democratic party establishment understood itself.

Neither Mason Dimora nor Russo McFaul
could see their own errors, so glaring and all

It's been pathetic, living on the fringe of these clowns and their respective "powerbases."  I try to breath life into people's constitutional rights as a paltry paid public pretenda, while these fuckers are making and stealing and hiding money while on the county teat. What a rotten, rigged system it has been.  And the only possible defense is, that it's been done this way for decades.  Horray for our society!  We've been at the hands of corrupt, self-serving, incompetent frauds for decades!  And wait just one minute before you Republican sluts get sanctimonious:  You're even worse.

It's time to clean up American politics. plain and simple.  Do you're fucking jobs, people!

A word of advice, Mr. Dolan and Fitzgerald: Stand united.  Cleveland D's & R's are different than U.S. R's & D's.  Don't confuse the two.  Cleveland and Cuyahoga have interests different from any other in our nation: strategic, environmentally sound, sustainable, hard-rocking interests.  International port? Maybe not. But certainly an International destination.  Rock Hall?  Sokolowski's? Metroparks? Lakewood? Tremont? Great Lakes Region?  Majestic Wind Farms? Casino? Asian Carp Infestation?

Speaking of carp, I am reminded of one of my earliest personal parables and how I helped the levy pass.

Well, we know its a Business vs. Labor contest, now.

Sincere congrats to the winning candidates in yesterday's primary election in Clevelandia.  Are you sure you know what you're getting into, fellas?

Now, this campaign evolves  You've got the county corruption/county reform thing. You've got the national mood.  Cuyahoga, the poster child for entrenched political corruption, bureaucratic dysfunction, sacred ground, defiled. Race. Ethical campaign financing. Clean water. The County Executive is a Big Deal.  So, it's time to talk honestly about government.

Right here.

These are my ten questions for the candidates:


1.  This entire new charter government thing can be described as a three step process:  first, is the transition. second, is the new council and executive and row offices, third, is the charter review; the ongoing "look in the mirror" designed to gauge the effectiveness of our new government.  Please briefly describe your concerns about each step.

2.  If the county prosecutor should step down, what role, by law, would you have in selecting a replacement?  What caucuses would you consult?  And what of the role of County Prosecutor in the new charter?  Does the omni-presence of the prosecutor in the process (including funding streams to indigent defense) raise concerns?

3.  Talk about the Constitution

5.  Talk about R.E.M.'s song Cuyahoga, and its impact on your political or moral philosophy?



5.  Role of the ombudsman/public servant/public steward?

6. When loading a dish washer, do you put silverware pointing up or pointing down? Defend this practice.

Look Closer

Follow this link to an old article about a convicted cop named Hurley.  Study the photograph: in the center is the cop standing next to his lawyer.  But look past his other shoulder and behold the chilling, spectral presence of...of...BLOOMSDAY!

Curiouser and curiouser, I'd say.

For Those Playing Along @ Home...

"Homina!Homina!Homina!"

http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2010/09/businessman_accused_of_bribing.html

A Trinitarian Notion: The Truth, The Whole Truth, and Nothing But The Truth

I wound up in a teeny-tiny, itty-bitty, eensy-weensy little trial yesterday that ended in a just result.  It was classic "courtroom, classroom, theater, church" paradigm-shifting in action.

My opening question to the witness for the prosecution was a not-so-subtle reminder of their oath.  "Moments ago, you stuck your hand in the air and you swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth as you shall answer unto God, is that correct?"

"Yes," he says.

"Please explain to the court your understanding of the difference between the three."

For Those Playing Along @ Home...

This week's MasonStink:  Home value shenanegins hit home.

Long overdue answers on the Port Authority from Mike Roberts.

Above the stupid, corrupt fray, I look to the frank, rich wisdom of Frank Rich.

The Plot Thickens

Bloomsday meanders toward the mouth of the Cuyahoga on his lunch break.  Descending a century old brick street beneath the bright blue Main Avenue Bridge, he sees the vast rubbled acreage on the river's east bank.

What is the opposite of sacred ground? he thinks. Profane ground?  This lunar surface of dirt and broken concrete, pushed and piled and leveled arbitrarily was once the hotbed of tens of thousands of date rapes and D.U.I.'s.  The Flats.  The concentration of bars and nightclubs that filled this now-cratered landscape arose out of the factories and foundries that spilled unimaginable horrors into the river and the lake for decades.  Before that?  Torso murders. Shantytowns. East Coast surveyors. Indigenous peoples. Sacred ground.

His desolation stroll takes him to a better vantage point, near the first major bend in the river and Settler's Landing.  The skyline of Cleveland looms over this grassy knoll sloped toward the river. Gulls confront joggers on paths on the riverbank's edge.  Bloomsday rests on a bench to absorb the vista.

A elderly man walks slowly toward him.  Bloomsday hears his intermittent speech, shouts of "Look out!" as he waives his arms.  Despite his words, there is no urgency to his actions. No panic in his voice. His slow measured steps along the path at the top of the grassy hill, and his crisp khakis, perpetuate the incongruity.  As the man nears, Bloomsday notices things in the man's hands.  Paper and pen in one, something that looks like an early 80's cell phone in the other.  He's making marks on the paper, then pushing buttons on the odd, archaic phone, then waiving his arms with shouts of "Look out!"  This is something he does all the time, Bloomsday deduces.  He's the most lackadaisical person waiving their arms and shouting "Look out!" I've ever seen.


The man pushes buttons again and behind him, at the farthest side of this park I see the wide spray of lawn sprinklers suddenly disappear.  He makes a note on his paper and pushes more buttons.  A Bellagio of water arches magically appears in front of me.  A sun bather and some pretty secretaries eating lunch jump and run for cover. The old man makes more marks on his paper and moves on.

Happy Birthday: Me 'n Marshall Brickman

I can't wait to unwrap my very own SENSORY DEPRAVATION TANK!!
Thanks, Molly!

Despicable Me!!

This was one of hundreds of cases I handled this week. Nothing funny about the facts, nothing funny about domestic violence, but my inner-McLuhan requires comment on this bit of theater, above.

Deep in my childhood, I saw an episode of Night Gallery entitled, "The Sins of the Fathers." The premise of the episode involved an actual ritual practiced by religious sects to this day: every town had a "sin eater" who, upon the death of a citizen, would arrive to feast on food left by loved ones and "consume" the sins of the departed. The sin eater assured safe passage into heaven for others while condemning himself to everlasting hell.

As I watch myself made pariah by the media's pathetic torch and pitchfork crowd, I though about that episode of Night Gallery, and how, some day those who practice the dark art of fingerpointing will need me to consume their sins, as well. "WHITE CHEEZE!! ROAST BEEF!! PIE!!" beckons Geraldine Page to Richard Thomas...

P.S.: "Half-off facials? Say, 'Wha...?!'"

Public Servant versus Public Steward

I am a public servant, a unique one.

I beg for justice and mercy for the poor in the Poverty Capital of America as my father did before he died of a liquor-soaked, broken heart.  I am a lawyer paid insufficiently by the county to represent the interests of people charged with crimes.  I work for the government on behalf of individual citizens AGAINST that same government.  I am overworked, underpaid, and provided paltry resources to assist me in preserving and protecting the Constitutional rights of poor people in Cleveland.

Cleveland is in the midst of the largest public corruption investigation our nation has ever known.  Hundreds of FBI agents raided dozens of locations two years ago.  The initial investigation seemed to target public contracts and bribes involving county commissioners, but it quickly evolved into a labyrinthine mess involving multiple jurisdictions and dozens of public officials and their associates engaged in a variety of self-dealing schemes. The hive for these activities was the Cuyahoga County Democratic Party, which also had it's offices raided.

In the Venn diagram of public service, public stewards are those in the small circle within the larger one: an elite group of public servants actually selected to preserve the public trust.  They may be elected, they may be appointed, they may be hired by those elected or appointed, but a public steward has a higher duty to the people.  In many cases they take an oath -- swear to their God -- that they will serve the public with honor an integrity: a personal promise to serve the people.

In Cleveland, the Cuyahoga County Democratic Party has, for decades, determined who ascends to the echelon of public stewardship in county offices and municipal offices within the county.  The public consciousness has only recently awakened to what I've known my entire professional life:  the Cuyahoga County Democratic Party has been run by crooked, self-serving, frauds who ignore their oaths and obligations to the people. Criminals masquerading as public stewards.

As I look out for the least among us in this town, those who swore to look out for the people piss on them, instead.  I know because their briny streams hit me, too.  My agency, the Cuyahoga County Public Defenders Office relies, in no small part, on county government for resources.  My salary has been cut, I share a single support staffer with a dozen other lawyers (which means I am entitled to one-twelfth of her time, I suppose) I stand in packed courtrooms expected to effectively represent dozens of people each day, my intake lobby is crowded each afternoon with 40 to 60 people looking for legal assistance and three or four lawyers are expected to advise them all.  It's pathetic. It's shameful. There is nothing democratic about a county democratic party that pisses on the poor and their constitutional rights.

So, it's public servant versus public steward, now.  We will purge you from our midst and start again without you.    We will never forget you: you'll be remembered long after you're gone as self-serving frauds who pissed upon the people you promised to serve.  I'll make sure people remember.  I'll consider it my proudest achievement in a lifetime of public service.

Welcome to the Bloomsday Device.

Dear Marty Zinotti

Thank you so much for demolishing the United Skates of America to make room for your Cornerstone Disaster. That roller rink represented my burgeoning inability to get laid, circa 1980. I think it was the Husky jeans.  Anyways,  I thought I'd drop you a line to say that WE TRUST YOU AS FAR AS WE CAN THROW YOU.

I don't know who tapped you as spokescreature, but it's time to pass the torch.

Best Wishes.  It's racist to call Lillian Green sad.  Just because she's black. Not all African-Americans are sad, you know. "No, You're Sad!"
"No, You're Sad!"
"No, You're Sad, Marty!
"No, You're Sad, Lillian!

Father's Day Intermission

There Will Be Bloomsday

For the unititiated: click here
For the initiated: click here

Cameras in the Courtroom

[This device is conducting diagnostic testing.  This process may take several minutes.  Do not taunt or speak ill of the device. The device remembers everything.]

I happened to walk into an interesting meeting at work; one that I was not invited to.  The fact that I was not invited is particularly curious because the topic -- how to transition to a fully equipped electronic recordation and transcription system -- is central to my work as a criminal defense lawyer assigned to the very courtroom where these new procedures are being implemented.

So I crashed the party and told those present what they need to know, which is this:

Now, before I refer to the matter to the newly formed Commission on Media and Legal Integrity, I should say this:  I am a lawyer in the poverty capital of america.  I am also at the podium in court most days. I am also recorded.  There are limits to to use of cameras in the courtroom for a variety of reasons.  I would never consent, for example, to conducting a trial in a criminal matter via video conferencing technology.  I want to be in the courtroom with the witnesses and the defendant.  And the judge.  We should all be in one room during such serious proceedings.

But there are many occasions when I would be o.k. with another party in another location appearing, or even testifying under oath via video conferencing technology.  For example, I would always consent to a complainant in a domestic violence pre-trial testifying in such a manner.  I would always consent to police officers in preliminary matters testifying via video conferencing.

Then, there's the matter of my physical proximity to the defendant, and my ability to ensure his Constitutional guarantees are respected.  Those include:  effective Assistance of Counsel, the right of confrontation, the right to a respected attorney-client privilege.  I always prefer a defendant to be present with me, and will object to his tele-presence in certain situations.  But, sometimes it's ok.  I don't need to be standing next to a guy to ask that his bond be reduced.

One obvious advantage to conducting preliminary matters via video conferencing is that the shamefully inadequate courtrooms won't be clogged with the indignity of prisoners shuffling through the gallery. I hate that.  Especially when, in the middle of another matter, I'm told to step aside for the prisoners.  I want them to see me in action, and I want to be in the same room with them, but the utter indignity of the sardine courtroom set up compels me to agree with the video conference method.

A constitutional analyst might find that foreboding, but if Lawrence Tribe were in the room with me (and he should be...) I think he'd see the wisdom of my position.

There are safeguards.  I have a "secure" phone line to talk outside the earshot of everyone.  Coming soon, I will have a separate room to engage in conversation with prisoners via phone.  I am told these phone lines are impenetrable against surveillance.  I don't believe that, and I'm never going to have a conversation by phone that  isn't mindful of the possibility that others may be listening.  I tell my clients that, too.

Aside from the procedural and constitutional concerns, there is the initially troubling fact that 90% of what I say (which is probably 50% of what I think) is recorded. On any given day, I may say thousands of words on behalf of dozens of clients into a microphone in front of a camera. I beg, I advocate, I cross-examine.  Know anyone else who has a job like that?  It means I have to look and sound articulate and competent and wise.
Good thing I'm all of the above and dead sexy, too.

Cameras serve several masters:  they "promote efficiency" when used to teleconference court proceedings, they create a permanent record of legal proceedings, they monitor the behavior of parties in the courtroom. I want my clients to know they're being recorded when they walk in the courtroom.  I want them to see themselves on a screen: a curious trip through the looking glass.  It's a trip I took long ago and re-emerged a better lawyer.

He loved Big Brother.

Inside the Manifesto

Read this:

http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2010/05/judge_throws_out_murder_charge.html

You may be surprised at my response to this article.  It has nothing to do with the facts of the case or the decision of the judge.  It has to do with the narrative.  It has to do with how a spokesperson for a county prosecutor violates his professional responsibility in a pretty flagrant way.  The  very notion  of a spokesperson for Bill Mason is appalling.  Why can't he speak for himself?, one might ask.  Perhaps he's too busy pursuing a Wind Energy Feather in his Cap, or being intimately involved in cases where people's convictions are overturned because of prosecutorial impropriety.  At any rate,  Bill Mason has abused his office again and again.

Perhaps he and Ryan should go where a county prosecutor should go.  To the courtroom, so they, themselves , can see the utter incompetence, fraudulence and corruption they preside over and propagandize.

The problem dates back many years, but coincides with the pathetic turn of local news media into twenty-four-seven infotainment.  It's a cozy relationship: 19 Action News gets the inside dirt on lots of criminal cases while tainting and alarming the jury pool public; Mason gets to set the narrative in all criminal cases, and has the help of a spokesperson to do it.  Nevermind that it is a violation of professional ethics to discuss cases, state facts, give opinions.  It's just business as usual.  Sometimes it's an even cozier relationship:  I'm not sure who's fucking whom between the Plain Dealer staff and the County Prosecutor's Office staff, but it's time for the PD to make a mea culpa if it's editorial content has been compromised by sexual relationships.

Ultimately, the local news media has acquiesced to a propaganda machine.  Think I'm over-reacting?  Ask Ryan Miday the difference between what he knows and what he believes.  Then ask him who helped him draft the clever script in the article, above.

He and/or his spokesperson should feel free to post a response.  Or perhaps he should let his attorney speak on his behalf. "Hello, Cleveland Metropolitan Bar Association?"

Welcome to the Bloomsday Device.

Plain Dealer Sponsors Broma Kabuki

http://www.cleveland.com/cuyahoga-county/index.ssf/2010/05/broma_technologies_owner_charged_in_cuyahoga_county_corruption_probe.html

For those playing along at home...

Smell the metaphor.

For those playing along at home...

Mason? Hmmm...

Saffold?  Hmmm...

Above the stupid, corrupt fray of Cuyahoga County, I turn to the frank and rich wisdom of Frank Rich.

Gulf of Mexico, Mon Amour

Drill, Baby, Drill. Remember?  Remember those giddy fascist rallies, goose stepping for the oil industry?  I do. I remember. I never forget a thing. 

Krugman

Krugman

New Order, Venn Diagrams, Dialectic Materialism, Disco, etc...

For those playing along at home...

Here's the decision of the Ohio Supreme Court removing the judge assigned to the Anthony Sowell murder trial.

On the County Corruption front, a coupla things:

Things turned salacious this week, if you consider flubbery massages in Vegas salacious.

Bloomsday's home town gets a shout out for giving a crooked lawyer a pink slip.  Check out the gazebo on that official looking letterhead!  For the uninitiated, the correct pronunciation is: Royal-tron.  The entire city is actually an animatronic facsimile, co-sponsored by Disney, Duracell and the FBI.  Listen carefully for the recorded narrations by Jeff Bridges.

Here Comes That Week...

April 19, America's Horrible Holiday, is here.  Don't worry, It'll be past soon enough. Then it's America's Stoner Holiday (4:20/4-20, dude, whatever that means.)  But then comes The BIG ONE: Dead Daddy Day.  Our Man in Clevelandia died in the wee hours of April 23, 1995.  The weekend after Oklahoma City's courthouse was bombed.  I think that awful day killed my old man.  It flat-lined his already-broken heart.

So, Fifteen years later, it is with great pleasure that I tell the story of my father's last day alive.

Saturday, April 22, 1995, was three days after the Oklahoma City bombing. That event cast a pall over the country and diminished my father's already weary spirit.  He was doomed, regardless. Doctors had given him six months to live that prior Christmas. Booze, cigarettes, and a lousy diet hat clotted and pickled his heart.  Here it was, four months later, and his anguish for the dead would finally squeeze the life out of him.

I was living at home with my parents at the time, having just passed the bar with a hundred and twenty grand in law school loans coming due.  That morning, my mother was out and I was left alone with my father as he absorbed the news of the rubble on TV.  My father watched TV a lot.  He often slept in front of it. He would die in front of it.  He sat, ashen-faced and out of breath, staring at the tube, clutching a pillow to his chest.

The Clinton's were on C-Span, talking to a group of children at the White House about the terrible events in Oklahoma, trying to express to third-graders why such horrors happen and how we should respond to them.  The president was talking to children about death, about living on after losing a loved one, about honoring the memory of those who die throughout your own life.  My father and I had tears in our eyes as we listened.

I made breakfast for the two of us: bacon, eggs, rye, and we ate together.

C-Span then presented Jerry Lewis at the National Press Club.  He was starring in a revival of Damn Yankees! at the National Theater in DC, and spoke with ease and humor about his life.  He was genuinely funny.  Gone was that maudlin Lewis from the telethons.  He peppered his presentation with "Ooofs" and "Hey, Laaay-deee's" and had the crowd roaring.  My father and I roared, too.  We laughed until it hurt.  We laughed until we cried.

Those were curious tears.  We were laughing together, of course, but we were also in the grasp of a rare spectrum of emotions. Joy, sorrow, regret, relief.  Fathers and sons. Life and death. 8-25. 33.

I had cleaned up all traces of our breakfast, but when my mother returned, she smelled the lingering aroma of bacon and knew she had missed out on something.

The day went on. I left that afternoon knowing that I'd be sleeping elsewhere. I had a date to see The Spanic Boys, a father/son alt-country duo at Wilbert's.

According to my mother, the day ended with my father on the couch as she went to bed.  She'd be awaked hours later by the extraordinarily loud volume of the TV.  When she investigated, she found my father struggling and unable to speak.  Had he summoned her with the remote control?

The ambulance came and took him to Parma Hospital where he was pronounced dead in the same hospital where I was born on his 33rd birthday.  I picked up my mother and we got there moments after he did.  He was gone.  But I must tell you this:  He was still warm when I touched him, and I was shocked to notice that he looked better than he had in years.  He had the curl of a smile, and peace on his face, and bacon and eggs in his belly.  I believe the word to describe his appearance is: beatific.

For those playing along at home...

Interesting tidbit: Computer firm with Masonic ties pulls the plug on Cuyahoga Information Systems contract.

But wait, there's more:  CAMEO rep with Masonic ties charged with theft in Florida and questioned about ongoing county corruption investigation.

Finally, a think piece in the New York Times about internet privacy and The Plain Dealer.

Musical Interlude (la musica de enterlude)

All Politics is Personal

"Here, Here!" sayeth Bloomsday.

Just your average man on the street

Two guys with a camera stop me in a coffee shop.  Let the improvisational moral theater begin.
Did I mention poverty enough, or what?

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid68820582001?bctid=68939184001

The Leviathan Trilogy

[invocation/opening procession]

Friends, Lawyers, Countymen,
Lend me your ears.
I come to bury our commissioners, not to praise them.

The evil that men do lives after them.
The good is oft interred with their bones.
So let it be with our commissioners...

The noble Reformer hath told you our
our commissioners were ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
and grievously hath our commissioners answered it.

Here, under leave of the Reformer and the rest,
(for the Reformer is an honorable man;
so are they all; all honorable men...)
come I to speak in our commissioners' funeral.

The posted notices for this presentation were removed from the common areas of Elsinore Courthouse -- twice -- by honorable men.  If you saw one, you would have found this presentation is titled: County Corruption, County Reform: A Lawyer's Primer.  This is an accurate discription; a worthy title.  It is also a volatile one that motivates honorable men to keep it from public view.

So now let us rename this presentation as something a little more covert, under the radar, something that might make honorable men scratch their heads with puzzlement, but would not compel them to remove public notices bearing its name.  Let us now call this presentation: The Leviathan Trilogy.

What is Leviathan?
What is Social Contract Theory?
What is the State of Nature?

Now that I have opened the door to the central metaphor of this presentation, I will push you through. But you can skip the book, we're going straight to the movie.  Leviathan: The Movie.  It's a trilogy, actually, with a prequel and a sequel.  Let us begin.

Three Organizations Through Time:

The Transition Group (The Prequel)
The New County Government (Leviathan)
Charter Review Commission (The Sequel)

LEVIATHAN: THE PREQUEL
THE TRANSITION GROUP: Created by the SECTION 13.07 of the Charter passed by voter referendum (issue 6). Precedes the new government:

Current County Commissioners SHALL designate three senior administrative officials (McCAFFERTY/HOLLAND/NANNI) who SHALL develop recommendations for the orderly and efficient transition to the operation of the county govt. under this charter and SHALL work with newly elected county officials. BOCC SHALL Provide necessary facilities and support for TAG and SHALL make provisions in the county budget for salaries of elected officers and for such matters as shall be necessary and practicable to provide for the transition. ALL COUNTY OFFICIALS and EMPLOYEES SHALL cooperate with TAG and SHALL use their best efforts to assist the newly elected County officials and their designees and representatives in implementing transition.

Executive Committee: (charter makes no mention of an "executive committee," but we have one anyway)

McCafferty County Admin
Zanotti -issue 6 cheerleader, New Cuyahoga Now policy group, former mayor of Parma Hts.
McShepard - RPM International (Medina-based contributor to Issue 6: $10,000)
Thornton
Cutler - CEO of Eator Corp ($50,000 to Issue 6)
Zenty - Chief Exec University Hospitals
Mayor Frank Jackson

Committee of Chairs:

Public Engagement, County Government Collaboration, Finance/Administration, Justice Services, Human Services, Human Resources, Information Technology, Procurement and Public Works, Economic Development, County Council Planning, Boards and Commissions

FIRST TEST:
OPENNESS/TRANSPARENCY   (flunked)

BLOOMSDAY SAYS:  EVERY GATHERING RELATED TO THE TRANSITION MUST BE IN A PUBLIC FORUM, MUST BE VIDEO RECORDED FOR LIVE OR SUBSEQUENT BROADCAST, MUST BE TRANSCRIBED BY A STENOGRAPHER. BOTH VIDEO FEED AND TRANSCRIPTIONS MUST BE AVAILABLE ON THE INTERNET.  ALL MEETINGS SHOULD TAKE PLACE IN A PUBLIC AUDITORIUM, PERHAPS SOMEWHERE LIKE...LIKE...
PUBLIC AUDITORIUM!!!
SELL POPCORN, NACHOS, PRETZELS AND DOGS, IF YOU WANT.
ALL MEETINGS ARRANGED BY THE TRANSITION ADVISORY GROUP SHOULD TAKE PLACE AT THE SAME TIME, THE SAME LOCATION, TWICE MONTHLY PERHAPS. HOW ABOUT FIRST AND THIRD WEDNESDAY?  CONCURRENT MEETINGS OF COMMITTEES SHOULD ALL OCCUR AT ONCE, SAME PLACE, SAME TIME, SAME LOCATION, AND SHOULD EACH REPORT TO ALL AFTER CONCURRENT MEETINGS END.

SECOND TEST:

SCOPE OF DUTIES (flunked)

Basically should be finding tables and chairs and video cameras and stenographers pens and paper. Instead, TAG is setting policy for the new government to be:

Cut County Expenses by 15% and redirect money into economic development projects.

LEVIATHAN: THE MOVIE
THE NEW COUNTY GOVERNMENT:
Elected County Executive, Eleven County Council Members

Office Term Shenanigans/ Redistricting Shenanigans
Council Districting Commission (immediately following 2010 census)

Lesgislative Action:

Adoption by council: No action of Council shall be valid or binding unless adopted by an affirmative vote of at least a majority of members (6). Each ordinance or resolution shall be signed by presiding officer and promptly presented by the Clerk of Council to the County Executive for approval or disapproval.

County Exec may approve or disapprove the whole or any item of an ordinance or resolution appropriating money, but otherwise the approval or disapproval shall be addressed to the entire ordinance or resolution. IF the County Executive approves, shall be signed and returned to the Clerk w/in ten days after passage or adoption. IF County Executive does not approve, County Executive shall return the measure with his or her written objections within 10 days. Such written objections shall be entered in full in the record of proceedings of the Council. If County Executive does not return a measure within 10 day period, the measure shall take effect as if County Exec had approved.

When County Exec has disapproved an ordinance or resolution, or part or item therein, The Council may, not later than its second regular meeting following such disapproval, proceed to reconsider the disapproved measure. IF, upon reconsideration, the measure is approved by at least 8 members of Council, it shall then take effect as if it has received the approval of the County Executive.

Appointed OFficers: (The Row Offices)

Each shall be appointed by the County Executive, subject to confirmation by council, and shall serve at the pleasure of the County Executive

Fiscal Officer: Shall exercise all powers and perform all duties now or hereafter vested in or imposed by general law upon county auditors and county recorders and the powers and duties of clerks of the court of common pleas other than those powers and duties related to serving the operation of the courts; tax maps.

Medical Examiner

Clerk of Courts

Director of Public Works

Director of Law

County Treasurer

Sheriff

Boards and Commissions: Budget commission is: the County Executive, the Fiscal Officer, and The County Prosecutor.


LEVIATHAN: THE SEQUEL
CHARTER REVIEW COMMISSION: SECTION 12.09

Commencing in Sept 2012, County Exec, with confirmation of council, shall appoint CRC consisting of nine electors.

THE INITIAL CHARTER REVIEW COMMISSION SHALL INCLUDE IN ITS DELIBERATIONS CONSIDERATION OF CHANGES IN THIS CHARTER FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING MORE EFFECTIVE REPRESENTATION OF INDIGENT DEFENDANTS, FOR ADEQUATE FUNDING AND SUPPORT FOR THE OPERATION OF THE OFFICE OF THE COUNTY PUBLIC DEFENDER, AND FOR THE APPROPRIATE METHOD FOR SELECTION OF THE COUNTY PUBLIC DEFENDER.

Our Man in Clevelandia

Decorum Interruptus

I'm a shit rolls down hill lawyer.  I handle cases that no one else wants to deal with, at a startling volume, in the Poverty Capital of America. But even if my clients don't think of me as a real lawyer, even if judges, cops or prosecutors treat me with sneering contempt, I have a deep allegiance to the Constitution.  There is this supposed hierarchy among lawyers in America that is capped by the Justices of the Supreme Court of the United States and descends down, like a caste system, through federal and state practicioners, all the way down to shit rolls down hill lawyers like me. 

Even though I live in a country where far too many lawyers get far more credit than they deserve, get paid exorbitant amounts without any proportionate contribution to society, ascend to the bench because of political considerations, and basically act like they own the joint, I still show respect for the system.  I maintain decorum.  Which is why I'm so incensed by Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito's snotty behavior at the State of the Union.  Put the substance of the issue aside. It's the style and form of the moment that speak volumes about the man.

It's the President's forum. It's the President's moment to speak.  Alito had his chance to speak through the majority opinion or a concurrence, could have read it out loud if he wanted to.  But instead, he mouthed his bratty words for the camera when it wasn't his turn to speak.  He might as well have screamed, "You Lie!"

I've gotten to the point in my professional career where judges, at least, give me the courtesy of not interrupting me while I advocate for my clients.  It wasn't always that way.  I do the same for them, and admonish others for speaking when it's the judge's turn to make a record.  And that's how I viewed the moment: an utter absence of decorum on behalf of a member of the highest echelon of my profession.  If I shook my head, muttering "not true, not true" as the judge spoke, I'd be a dick.

What a dick you revealed yourself to be, Mr. Alito. You Federalist Society creeps are all alike. Not a one of you have ever begged for justice and mercy for the poor. Every one of you blathers on about how right you are about everything.  All shameful, despicable frauds you are. The highest echelon of my profession, my ass.

I say, shit rolls down hill to the highest echelon of our profession.  Ponder that paradox, sir. You want to witness the best of our profession?  Come find us looking out for the least among us in the Poverty Capital of America.  We'll teach you a few things.  Bring Scalia, Thomas and Roberts, too.



Welcome to the Bloomsday Device

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Andre Bauer Is Not Against Animals
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Economy

If you didn't listen to the MLK "I have a dream" speech today, that's a shame.  Actually, go listen to it right now, then come back. I'll wait.

All right. You probably never noticed this before, but it's much more than a plea for equality.  It's a plea for justice for all people.  Justice.  That word is found a dozen or so times in the first half of the speech.
Blackey-black-black and whitey-white-white can argue about equality. They can get blackey-white-white and whitey-black-black or blackey-white-black and whitey-black-white to join in the fray. Even blackey-black-white and whitey-white-black will get provoked to take a side now and then.

But they must all side with justice, or else.  You don't want justice for all in this world? You want to look out for your own and to hell with the rest?  Then, you're an asshole. You're un-American. And everyone around you will know you as an un-American asshole long before you figure it out way too late.

Welcome to the Bloomsday Device.